Curse

Guillaume De Sonoma · Aug 28, 2005, 12:20 AM // 00:20

The guy above me is my guild leader

Doooom · Nov 17, 2005, 07:54 PM // 19:54

I was reading someone else's post on a "Physical Version of a Mesmer" and this got me thinking about a melee master of interrupts. So I decided this should be the class:

The Jerk.

He should be really tough, yet be very vulnerable to shouts and to magic due to lack of intelligence and/or willpower.

Another drawback: 2x aggro bubble, thus aggroing anything remotely nearby.

Some possible skills:

Shove: Enemy moved back. Also contributes to "Knock Over", explained later.

Crouch: Second part of "Knock Over".

Indian Burn: Disables weapon or negates focus item for 5-15 seconds due to pain afficted on arm

Noogie: Negates abilities of scalp patterns due to scalp irritation

Punch in the eye: Cause 25-50 dmg and Blindness.

Kick in the groin: Cause 25-50 dmg and hampers movement similar to Hamstring.

Your Mom! (Shout): Immediately casts Frenzy on opponent, friend or foe.

OMFG you n00B: Immediately inflates ego, thus increasing abilities but only when rushing massive parties.

And a special team attack performable only by two Jerks-

Knock over: One Jerk moves behind enemy and perfoms Crouch, getting on hands and knees. Other Jerk moves in front of enemy and performs Shove. Enemy is knocked down for 5-15 seconds, loses half of Energy due to embarassment.

benmanhaha · Nov 17, 2005, 08:06 PM // 20:06

did you have a troubled childhood?

Omega_2005 · Nov 17, 2005, 08:08 PM // 20:08

No, i think this was a parody from another thread

Why not make more classes (parodies)?

another skill for Jerk:

OMG I so can't believe j00 jus said that! (shout): causes crippled and hamstring, and causes 20---75 garbage-talking damage to opponents in area (makes them stop running ftw!

)

EDIT #2: Why not change the title to "Classes you'd never see in Guild Wars" or merge it with another older thread that is familiar?

Doooom · Nov 17, 2005, 08:08 PM // 20:08

benmanhaha:

Nope. I just think jerks and bullies are funny, and I'd love to see someone be able to push over another character.

How do I edit or merge?

Omega_2005 · Nov 17, 2005, 08:29 PM // 20:29

I can't find the old thread, so it's acceptable to put in random skills and attributes for this one

IF you find similar, try and ask an Admin like Slade xTekno and they'll search the archive to find the thread

Slade xTekno · Nov 17, 2005, 08:32 PM // 20:32

Lol, if only W/Mos could take a third profession...

Doooom · Nov 17, 2005, 08:41 PM // 20:41

Yeah, you'd have a ton of W/Jerks for sure.

Old Dood · Nov 17, 2005, 09:18 PM // 21:18

Hmm...well if there is a Jerk Class..the we need an Offender Class.

Then you can be a Jerk/Off!

Lou · Nov 17, 2005, 09:26 PM // 21:26

The crazy middle aged man is right!

Doooom · Nov 17, 2005, 11:35 PM // 23:35

That's beautiful, Dood. The offender could master strictly offensive shouts and demoralize the opposition.....

Omega_2005 · Nov 17, 2005, 11:41 PM // 23:41

like ....this skill? *salvages the idiot's guide of every single class*

"STFU!!!" - Elite shout, Offends nearby kids and parents with 30-70 damage. this has 100% armor penetration. [ATTRIB: Midlife Crisis]

Guillaume De Sonoma · Nov 18, 2005, 02:56 AM // 02:56

This was the thread that was a lot like it

http://www.guildwarsguru.com/forum/s...hlight=posting

TheEPIC · Nov 18, 2005, 04:14 AM // 04:14

Hmm, so in the expansion can I be an ass/jerk?

Omega_2005 · Nov 18, 2005, 12:54 PM // 12:54

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guillaume De Sonoma

This was the thread that was a lot like it

http://www.guildwarsguru.com/forum/s...hlight=posting

Oh THAT's the one!

thanks Guillaume!

Doooom, merge this with the other thread

Savio · Nov 18, 2005, 01:15 PM // 13:15

I'm not Doooom, but I'm the one who merges.

Stormfire · Nov 18, 2005, 02:08 PM // 14:08

I think the Computer Nerd shout have a new skill, 'Well of Masterbation'. Ever see a computer nerd with a girlfriend/boyfriend? Me either. Come to think of it, that would lend a whole new meaning to 'exploit nearest corpse'.

DavenXion · Nov 18, 2005, 03:11 PM // 15:11

The Link, she es no good. And Stormfire...ewh, just...ewh.

Xue Yi Liang · Nov 18, 2005, 03:39 PM // 15:39

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dumb Quixote

Level 20 Toddler

Attributes:
Tantrum - 14
Persistence - 10
Distraction - 6

Skills:

Fists of Fury - Linked attribute: Tantrum. Target is stunned for 10-15 seconds. If in stance, everything being carried is dropped. If moving, target is knocked down. 10/5/10

Wobbler {Elite} - Linked attribute: Tantrum. Target suffers humiliation and shame. If knocked down, Target's movement is restricted for 20 seconds. 25/0/90

GimmeGimmeGimme - Linked attribute: Persistence. Interrupts target foe's current skill and disables for 15 seconds. 5/0/0

"Why?" - Linked attribute: Persistence. Interrupt that reduces armor of all foes and eventually causes exhaustion. 10/5/5

"Cat's on fire" - Linked attribute: Distraction. A Level 4 spirit is created. For targets in range, all skills take longer to accomplish and end in less than satisfying results. 5/10/20

Parental Weakness - Unlinked skill. For 8-20 seconds, toddler moves 25% faster and discovers all hidden pressure buttons for parents. 5/1/60

lmao.
my favorite one.

Mesmerized · Nov 18, 2005, 03:43 PM // 15:43

Quote:

3.) "Cheer Up Emo Kid" - When cast, all enemies in area suffer a -15% to morale. (Attrib: Morbidity.)

ROFL I THINK I PEEED MYSELF!